


maybe we're perfect strangers

by ecubed



Category: K-pop, NCT (Band)
Genre: Aged Up NCT Dream, Alcohol, Attempt at Humor, Awkwardness, Boys Kissing, Crushes, Fluff, Friendship, Huang Ren Jun-centric, Humor, M/M, Making Out, Mutual Pining, NCT Dream Ensemble-centric, Out of Character, Strangers to Lovers, Stupidity, Weddings, at the beginning, or - Freeform, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:09:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23648992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ecubed/pseuds/ecubed
Summary: “It’s not that,” Renjun dismisses, “It’s just that you haven’t left me much time to find a date.” He frowns. “I was supposed to win this break up.”Jaemin reaches out towards him, placing both hands on Renjun’s shoulders. “It’s not a competition,” he says slowly.Renjun snorts, throwing off Jaemin’s hands. “Everything is a competition,” he says fiercely. “And if Yukhei is bringing a date, then so am I.”Renjun needs a date for Jaemin's wedding. Jeno looks a lot like that date.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno, Huang Ren Jun/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Na Jaemin/Wong Kun Hang | Hendery, Park Jisung/Zhong Chen Le, past - Relationship
Comments: 27
Kudos: 340
Collections: noren fic fest round 1





	maybe we're perfect strangers

**Author's Note:**

> prompt #013
> 
> thank you to the prompter for submitting this idea. this probably isn't exactly what you were expecting, and it's not what i had in mind at the start, but it kind of took on a life of it's own, so i hope you and anyone else who reads it, can find some enjoyment in this monster. 
> 
> anyway... noren are cute etc. etc.
> 
> enjoy

“So, um, I thought that you should know that Yukhei is bringing a date to the wedding.”

Renjun chokes on his drink.

He sputters once, twice. Coffee trickles from the corner of his mouth. Renjun grabs a napkin from the dispenser, wipes the dribble from his face, before furiously dabbing at the front of his jacket, now spattered with pinpricks of brown. “He’s doing what?”

“Don’t act like you didn’t hear me,” Jaemin says, rolling his eyes. “He called a couple of weeks ago, and asked if he could bring someone to the wedding.”

Renjun stares at him, incredulous. “And you said yes? _Why?_ ” His voice dips dangerously low. He cannot believe that Jaemin would do this to him “Wasn’t he _just_ supposed to be my plus one?” Renjun demands. “What gives him the right to bring his own plus one. He wasn’t even a real guest!”

Jaemin shrugs. “Of course he’s a real guest. He’s our _friend_. He’s your friend too in case you’ve forgotten.” He takes a long thoughtful sip of his Americano and Renjun’s known Jaemin long enough that he knows he’s not going to like whatever comes out of his mouth next.

“I don’t know why you care,” Jaemin says slowly. “You were the one who broke up with him, and we both know that he was more invested in your relationship than you were.” Jaemin pitches his voice offensively high. “Jaemin-ah, Yukhei’s so nice, so why don’t I want to meet his parents. Yukhei’s so hot, so why is kissing him so boring?”

Renjun glares at Jaemin, before the fight goes out of him and he slumps in his seat “Shut up. You know that deep down I’m happy for him.” He sighs. “I just wish you would have been more sensitive to my feelings.”

Jaemin blinks. “I thought you’d appreciate the direct approach. It’s very you.”

“It’s not that,” Renjun dismisses, “It’s just that you haven’t left me much time to find a date.” He frowns. “I was supposed to win this break up.” 

Jaemin reaches out towards him, placing both hands on Renjun’s shoulders. “It’s not a competition,” he says slowly as if Renjun is a child. He gently squeezes Renjun’s shoulder, and looks at him in that special way of his, as if one look can soothe Renjun’s wounded soul and extinguish whatever bad ideas are brewing within.

It’s too bad that Renjun’s immune. 

Renjun snorts, throwing off Jaemin’s hands. “ _Everything_ is a competition,” he says fiercely. “And if Yukhei is bringing a date, then so am I.” 

Jaemin eyes him warily. “You don’t even have a boyfriend. Where are you going to find a date?”

The answer comes to him easily, as if it had always been the plan, waiting dormant until Renjun was finally brave (or desperate) enough to put it into action. He feels that familiar recklessness stirring in the pit of his stomach, flooding his chest until his skin is buzzing with it.

This, more than anything, is why he and Donghyuck are such good friends - that vicious impulsiveness that they both have in common binds them as tightly as any secret. Renjun’s particular strain of stupid might be more subtle, less easily provoked, but both he and Donghyuck are equally responsible for the frown lines that bracket Jaemin’s mouth.

Jaemin presses his lips together. “An answer would be nice.”

Renjun shrugs. “Right here," he says. "I'm going to ask the hot barista.”

Jaemin looks at him for a moment, stunned, then he throws back his head and laughs - loud and obnoxious. He curls in on himself, slaps his thigh in mirth.

Renjun gives him a second to collect himself, but when Jaemin shows no signs of letting up, Renjun kicks him under the table, hard enough to bruise. People were starting to stare.

He crosses his arms and shoots Jaemin his best unamused look. “Thanks for the support.”

The grin drops from Jaemin’s face. “You were serious?” He wrinkles his nose. “You don’t even know him.”

“Three weeks is plenty of time to get to know someone. And then there’s also the wedding,” Renjun points out.

“That’s hardly any time at all,” Jaemin argues. “Best case scenario is you spend an awkward few hours making small talk with a stranger. Is it really worth it just to show up Yukhei?”

“Yes,” Renjun says simply. His mum had always told him that pride would be his downfall. He’s wonders if she's about to be proven right.

“But you don’t even know Jeno,” Jaemin repeats slowly, as if he thinks he’s going to get through to Renjun. “He’s not going to agree. He never even gets your name right.” Jaemin pauses for a moment. “Though that might have something to do with that time you introduced yourself as Dejun,” he sniggers.

The remark earns Jaemin another swift kick to the shins, and a rude hand gesture shoved in his face. “Shut up,” Renjun hisses. He hadn’t been prepared that time - Jeno had just dyed his hair a shocking shade of platinum blonde, it was only natural that Renjun would forget his own name, in favour of his second cousin’s. It could have happened to anyone.

“This time, I have a plan,” Renjun says, with a calmness he doesn’t feel. He needs to get this over with, before the rational part of his brain caught up with him, and he talked himself out of it. Renjun doesn’t know why this is so important to him, only that the thought of Jaemin’s wedding, and Yukhei seeing him there alone, makes him feel small and vulnerable, and he hates it. There’s nothing worse than people feeling sorry for you.

It’s this thought that spurs him into action. He stands up. “I’m going to do it.”

“Can I veto this plan?”

“No,” Renjun growls. “Now, just sit there and be supportive.” He takes a breath, fluffs up his hair, straightens his jacket, and draws himself up to his full height, which admittedly, is not all that impressive. “How do I look?”

“Like you’re about to do something stupid,” Jaemin says flatly. 

Renjun chooses to ignore him. He pushes himself out of the booth they’d been occupying, and joins the rapidly growing line in front of the counter.

He’s third in line when the doubt starts to creep up on him. Everything had happened so fast - the gap between idea and execution closed so quickly that he hadn’t really had a chance to think it all through. Jaemin’s disapproval doesn’t seem so irrational anymore - asking a (hot) stranger to his best friend’s wedding - what had he been thinking?

He hadn’t really. 

It was all his stupid pride - the same pride that was now propelling his legs forward, pushing him closer to the counter. Renjun knows it’s not too late to back out. He could always just pick up a fresh Americano for Jaemin, slip back into their favourite booth, and never mention this again. He could go to Jaemin’s wedding alone - dance with his friends, drink too much shitty wine, and spend the night getting introduced to every other single person there.

It wouldn’t be so bad. 

He could back down. He _should_.

But Renjun knows he won’t. So when Jeno calls out “Next please,” Renjun takes a deep breath, squares his shoulders and marches up to the counter.

Considering the amount of time that he and Jaemin have spent in this cafe over the past few months, Renjun feels as though he should have built up some kind of resistance to Jeno’s face. By now, he should be immune to those cheekbones, and broad shoulders. His reaction to Jeno is even more perplexing, because it’s not as though he has no experience with pretty people - back when they were in high school Jaemin had girls confessing to him every other day, Donghyuck is undeniably beautiful, and Chenle’s bone structure might as well have been designed in a lab. He’d dated Yukhei for fuck’s sake…. And yet for some reason Jeno left him feeling awkward and tongue-tied.

He’s so caught up in his thoughts, that it takes him a moment to realise that Jeno is talking to him. 

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Your order?” Jeno prompts gently. 

“Right,” Renjun rubs at his neck. That made sense. “Um… just an iced latte?”

“Size?”

“Just regular, I guess.” Renjun shrugs, his voice tilting up at the end, as if his words were a question.

“You don’t sound very sure about that,” Jeno laughs, punching Renjun’s order into the register. 

Renjun’s cheeks heat. 

Jeno looks up from the screen. “Will there be anything else? Maybe something for your friend?” 

Renjun glances over towards where Jaemin is sitting. He’s staring at his phone, eyes glued to the screen with an intensity that screams artificial. He doesn’t look up, doesn’t spare a glance at Renjun, determinedly pretending that he doesn’t know him. So much for being supportive and encouraging.

Renjun sighs, turns back to Jeno. “Might as well. He’s easier to manage when he’s caffeinated.”

“His usual?”

Renjun frowns. “You remember his order?” He ignores the prickle of jealousy that he feels at the thought of Jeno paying special attention to Jaemin.

Jeno wrinkles his nose. “It’s hard to forget. I’m not convinced it’s drinkable.”

The heavy feeling in Renjun’s stomach lightens. He snorts a laugh. “Just be grateful you’ve never tasted it. My tastebuds have never recovered,” Renjun says darkly. 

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” Jeno says seriously, his eyes twinkling. He looks as though he’s about to say something else, but then his gaze drifts behind Renjun, taking in the queue that’s grown by at least three people since Renjun had approached the counter. He gives Renjun an apologetic smile. “Is that everything?” he asks.

“Yes, thank you.”

Jeno turns the card reader towards Renjun. “That comes to $12.95.” Renjun taps his card against the reader, cursing Jaemin’s stupidly expensive coffee (Americano, extra shot, extra shot, extra shot…). 

“And the name for the order?”

“Renjun.”

“Renjun,” Jeno repeats carefully, scribbling the name down on a paper coffee cup that he hands off to his coworker. He turns back to Renjun, smile warm and genuine, and presents Renjun with his receipt. With that smile gracing his face, he looks so much younger, softer, kinder. It suits him. “Please wait on the left to collect your drink.”

“Thank you,” Renjun says, taking one last look at Jeno’s smiling face. 

He ignores the annoyed look that the woman lined up behind him is shooting in his direction, as he shuffles away to wait for his drinks. But the fluttery feeling in his stomach is more difficult to ignore and keeping the stupid smile off of his face is downright impossible.

He can’t help it. 

That had been the single longest exchange he'd had with Jeno in all the months that he’d been coming here, and it might have been wishful thinking on his part, but Jeno’s smile, the reverent way Jeno had said his name, felt like possibility. Like maybe his hopeless crush, wasn’t so hopeless.

It’s only when Renjun’s got his coffees in hand that he realises for all his good intentions, he’d never gotten around to asking Jeno to Jaemin’s wedding. That had been the whole point. It was why he’d lined up in that endless queue, and spent almost thirteen dollars on coffee. 

Shame curls in his stomach. He’d failed.

How was he supposed to face Jaemin now? Jaemin would know - would smell the failure on him, see it in every expression of Renjun’s face. 

His pride rears its head again - Renjun could never live that down. 

He has to fix this. Renjun closes his eyes, breathes deeply through his nose. He conjures up an image of Yukhei - beautiful, smiling Yukhei, looking down at him, eyes full of pity - and then just like that he’s stalking back towards Jeno, a determined set to his shoulders.

“Jeno.”

Jeno looks towards him in surprise. He’s in the middle of serving three teenage girls, forehead creased in concentration as he tries to keep their unnecessarily complicated orders straight.

One of the girls glares at Renjun. “Sorry, but we were next.”

“This will just take a moment,” Renjun retorts. He’s aware that he sounds rude, but he doesn't seem to care. 

He turns back towards Jeno. “Be my date to Jaemin’s wedding.”

Jeno’s eyes grow wide. “What?” 

“Come with me to Jaemin’s wedding,” Renjun repeats. 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Jeno says slowly. “I don’t know you.”

“You don’t need to,” Renjun argues. That’s what the wedding was for. “Please say yes.”

Jeno shakes his head. “Sorry, but no.”

Renjun has a horrifying thought. “You’re not straight are you?”

Jeno flushes, the tips of his ears growing pink. “Not that it’s any of your business, but that definitely not the reason.”

“Then why?” Renjun demands. He can sense Jeno’s growing discomfort, but he can’t stop himself. His mind flashes with images of Yukhei’s pitying eyes. The repeated chorus of _anyone would be lucky to have you_ rings in his ears. He sees himself sitting alone at their table cradling a glass of wine, while Chenle drags Jisung out for a slow dance. He leans over the counter. “I’m not weird. I promise.”

Jeno looks as though he wants to disagree. “Like I said before I don’t know you or your friend.” His face is carefully neutral.

“But-”

“Could you go,’ Jeno says, and any trace of that smile he’d gifted Renjun before is a distant memory. For the first time, Jeno’s placid demeanour seems to shatter, and he looks genuinely angry. “You’re making a scene and embarrassing me, and I have customers.”

Renjun blinks, and as suddenly as it seized him, the desperate determination abandons him, and he’s left empty. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to seduce Jeno with his gentle words and bottomless wit, not tactlessly demand Jeno as his date, while the rest of the coffee shop’s customers watched.

Jeno’s still glaring at him, and so Renjun does the only thing he can - he turns tail and runs. He makes it to the door, and of course, the automatic doors fail to register that he's standing right there.

“Come on,” he hisses. He steps backwards, then forwards until finally the doors slide open, but not before he hears snatches of the lecture Jeno is currently enduring at the hands of another customer. 

_“... unprofessional…. Highly inappropriate….manager….”_

Renjun flies out the door before he has to hear anymore.

He texts Jaemin from outside the nearby convenience store. The wind has picked up, the damp chill seeping through his clothes, until he’s shaking with it. He shivers in his thin jacket for ten minutes, waiting for Jaemin to show up. 

“Took you long enough,” Renjun snaps, taking the thick padded coat that Jaemin holds out for him. 

Jaemin shoots him a look so full of concern, that Renjun almost feels guilty. “Are you ok?” he asks.

“Yeah,” Renjun says quickly. It’s a lie, but there’s no use in talking about. “It’s fine. I’m just embarrassed.”

“Yeah, I can imagine,” Jaemin says. “That was the worst thing I’ve ever seen. You can never go back there.” 

Renjun laughs. He can’t help it. Jaemin’s words are blunt, honest, but his tone is gentle. Pull off the bandaid, soothe the hurt with a kiss. 

“ I don’t know what happened,” Renjun says. “I just couldn’t stop thinking about Yukhei feeling sorry for me, and everyone else looking at the both of us, and wondering what was wrong with me -” 

“Renjunnie,” Jaemin interrupts, wrapping a warm arm around his waist. He pulls Renjun close, squeezing tightly. “No one is going to think that.”

Renjun hardly registers his words. “-And then my mouth wouldn’t stop moving. I knew Jeno was uncomfortable, and yet, I just couldn’t let it go.” Renjun tucks his head into Jaemin’s neck. “It wasn’t supposed to go like that.”

“I know.”

Jaemin rubs his back. “It's ok. You don’t need a plus one. You’re enough for us.”

He’s probably right. 

Renjun feels suddenly tired, wants nothing more than to curl up in his bed and pretend none of this had ever happened. “Can you take me home, Jaem?”

* * *

Renjun drags himself out of bed the next day, feeling as though he hasn’t slept at all. A quick look in the mirror confirms that his appearance reflects that - his eyes are puffy, and his skin dull. He doesn’t linger over his reflection, just brushes his teeth as quickly as possible, unable to look himself in the eyes. 

The hot embarrassment he’d felt yesterday has faded into a heavy shame that settles in his stomach. Breakfast is an unconquerable obstacle - he barely manages to force down a bite of toast before he’s pushing his plate away. Carrying on as normal seems impossible, when he has so much to apologise for.

He already has three messages from Jaemin ( _hope ur ok, text me if you need anything_ and _don’t even think of going back there Renjun. I’m serious!!_ ).

Renjun being Renjun, has no intention of listening to Jaemin, and when he texts him back, he tells him as much. He dresses quickly, pulling on jeans and a wrinkled hoodie that he scoops up from the floor. He ignores the onslaught of messages that bombards his phone ( _Renjun, no. You’re just going to make things worse. Leave it alone. Please._ ), shoves his wallet into his pockets and is out the door before he can overthink things.

The coffee shop is only a short walk from his apartment, an even shorter walk from Jaemin’s, and for one horrifying moment he imagines Jaemin waiting there for him, an unimpressed look on his face as he drags Renjun home by the ears, but then he remembers that unlike him, Jaemin has a traditional 9 to 5, and the only reason he’d be allowed to leave the office at three in the afternoon, would be in the case of death (his own).

When Renjun finds himself in front of the same sliding doors he’d bolted through yesterday, he can’t help but hesitate for a moment. Returning to the scene of his latest humiliation doesn’t seem like the smartest idea. It would be easier to turn back to his apartment and try to forget all this. 

But the easy thing was not always the right thing, and while Renjun might be a lot of things, he had never been a coward. He closes his eyes, steadies himself, and steps towards the doors.

The second he steps inside, the scent of coffee fills his nose. The cafe is mercifully empty - one young woman sits huddled in the corner, typing furiously on her laptop, a stack of books spread across the two adjoining tables, and there’s a serious looking man in a suit, dozing in one of the back booths, but unlike the previous night, Renjun is unlikely to have an audience.

Jeno is the only one manning the counter. He looks good in his white long sleeve shirt, black apron sitting low on his slim hips. Seeing Jeno there floods Renjun with relief - he doesn’t know what he would have done if Jeno hadn’t been working.

Slowly, Renjun gathers up the courage to approach the counter. The sound of Renjun’s footsteps must alert Jeno to the fact that someone had entered the cafe, because he raises his head, looking up from the cake display he had been rearranging.

The moment his gaze falls on Renjun, Jeno’s posture stiffens.

Renjun swallows hard, but he doesn’t let his steps falter as he approaches the counter.

Jeno had every right to be angry, but he also deserved an apology, and Renjun was going to give him one.

“Hi,” Renjun says. Jeno’s eyes are cold, dismissive. It’s hard to look him in the eye, but Renjun won’t let his shame stop him from doing the right thing.

“You’re back,” Jeno says. He doesn’t sound happy about it, and Renjun can’t blame him. “What can I get you?” It’s curt, professional, leaving no room for small talk, no opening for Renjun to explain himself.

Renjun sighs. “I don’t know. Whatever takes the longest to make.”

Jeno glares. “Planning on cornering me so that you can harass me into being your wedding date again?”

Renjun’s face grows hot. “No. I wanted to apologise to you, actually. For yesterday.” 

Jeno doesn’t say anything, just looks at him suspiciously. It’s not much, but Renjun takes it as an invitation to go on. 

“I’m so sorry,” he blurts out. “For embarrassing you and making you uncomfortable, for not listening to you when you said no. For making a scene. For everything really.” He takes a breath. “I don’t really know what came over me - actually that’s not true, I know exactly what came over me - but it’s not an excuse for acting like an obnoxious asshole, and I’m so sorry.”

The words tumble out of him, and Renjun only hopes that it’s enough. He doesn’t expect Jeno to forgive him, all he needs is for Jeno to understand how sorry he is. 

A few long seconds pass, and Renjun realises he can’t avoid looking at Jeno forever. He raises his eyes from where he’d been determinedly studying the pattern of the faux marble counter, and finds Jeno looking at him, a crease working its way between his eyebrows.

For a moment, Renjun thinks he’s not going to answer, and his stomach twists with embarrassment, but then Jeno nods, “Ok.”

Renjun blinks. “Ok?”

“Thank you for apologising. Most people wouldn’t do that.” 

“People suck.”

“You included,” Jeno points out.

“Me included,” Renjun agrees. He feels lighter, and he can’t help the small smile that finds itself onto his face. “But are you really going to forgive me just like that? I would’ve made me work for it a lot more.”

Jeno shrugs. “I’m not good at holding a grudge.”

“You should work on that. It can be very satisfying,” Renjun tells him. 

“I’ll have to take your word for it.” Jeno says. He smiles at Renjun. It’s not quite the smile he’d given Renjun last night, but it’s a start. “Now will you be ordering anything or not?”

“I told you,” Renjun says. “Whatever’s the most time-consuming and expensive.”

“You’re going to regret that,” Jeno hums. He pulls out a large plastic cup, three different syrups, and a canister of whipped cream. 

He busies himself with filling the cup with ice. “So… I understand if it’s not any of my business, but what happened yesterday to make you act like that? Because you were nice, and then you weren’t, and now you are again, and I’m just wondering whether that’s a regular thing for you or…”

“Not a regular thing, no,” Renjun says awkwardly. “One time only event, I promise.”

He’s not sure why Jeno’s bothering to ask, but the expectant look on his face makes Renjun want to explain himself. “It’s stupid really,” Renjun sighs. “And I don’t know why it got to me so much, but my friend Jaemin - the overly caffeinated one - is getting married in a few weeks. And I was supposed to be going with my boyfriend. _Ex-boyfriend_ ,” Renjun corrects himself. “Then yesterday, Jaemin mentioned that my ex would be bringing a date, and I kind of lost it. I don’t know why. I’m not hung up on Yukhei. _I_ broke up with _him_. And yet the thought of him moving on so quickly…”

Renjun trails off, unable to finish the rest of his sentence. He’s not sure how to explain it - not sure if he should try. “It doesn’t matter, like I said, it’s stupid,” Renjun mumbles.

“No, it makes sense,” Jeno counters, coating the ice with a generous dose of syrup, and adding a dash of something pink and unidentifiable. “It was a pride thing.”

Renjun laughs humourlessly. “It’s my fatal flaw.”

“Why me though? You could’ve asked anyone else,” Jeno muses. “Asking someone who’s pretty much a stranger seems a little crazy.”

Renjun doesn’t bother mentioning his long-standing crush on Jeno. He’s not stupid enough not to realise he’d taken a sledgehammer to any potential chance he’d had with Jeno, with his behaviour last night. He keeps his voice carefully casual. “It seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“It wasn’t.”

Renjun rolls his eyes. “Thank you, I realise that now,” he says. “But I didn’t really have any other options. Yukhei knows everyone I know, and you were right there. It also doesn’t hurt that you’re cute, and even though you’re not as tall as Yukhei you look like you have enough upper body strength to take him out.” 

Jeno looks alarmed. “Would that have been necessary?”

“Probably not. Yukhei’s nice and completely harmless. And the breakup was mutual, so not much chance of you having to fight for my honour or anything like that. Still, knowing that my date could take out my ex-boyfriend would have been a nice little bonus. For the pride thing.”

Jeno laughs. “You know, maybe you should have led with all of that, instead of whatever it was you were doing last night. This makes you look a lot more sympathetic, and a lot less unbalanced.”

“Would it have worked?”

Jeno shrugs. “Probably not. Because it’s still weird. But it would have saved everyone a lot of trouble. I wouldn’t have had my manager talk to me about how unprofessional it was to have my boyfriend propose to me while I was at work, my new roommate wouldn’t have had to listen to me complain about this one terrible customer who ruined my night, and you wouldn’t have had to come here just to apologise.”

Renjun barely hears anything past the first few sentences. “Excuse me, but I didn’t propose to you” he yelps, scandalised at the thought. 

“That’s not what the customer told her. You should have heard her - complaining that the workplace was no place for personal relationships, how I spent more time dealing with you than doing my actual job.”

“I am so sorry,” Renjun groans. 

“It’s fine.” Jeno says. “Like I said, I’m over it.”

“Now how would you like to pay for this?” Jeno adds, handing Renjun the sugary monstrosity, he’d just finished making. There’s a mountain of whipped cream on top, dusted with pink sugar crystals. Renjun’s teeth ache just from looking at it.

Renjun takes out his wallet. “How much?” he asks warily.

“Nine dollars fifty,” Jeno says. He looks far too happy.

Renjun sighs deeply and hands over his card. 

He takes a sip, and cringes, mouth twisting in disgust. It’s so sweet, Renjun feels instantly sick. “Is there even any coffee in this?” he gasps.

“There’s coffee flavoured syrup,” Jeno says innocently. “And I did tell you you’d regret your choice.”

“You did,” Renjun concedes. He takes another sip, tries to keep his face straight. “But it’s honestly not that bad.”

“Liar. You don’t have to pretend.”

“Yeah I do,” Renjun says sincerely. Jeno’s answering smile sends his heart racing and suddenly, he feels the overwhelming need to leave, because this is getting too close to flirting and he has no business flirting with Jeno. No right to get his hopes up. He clears his throat. “I’ve probably taken up way too much of your time today,” he says. He gestures to the very empty cafe. “I’ll leave you to your customers.”

“Ok,” Jeno says. “I suppose I should probably get back to doing my job.”

Renjun grins. “Bye Jeno.” He turns towards the door, about to make his exit, when a thought strikes him. 

“I just need to ask this - for Jaemin’s sake, because caffeine is his lifeblood- but are we banned from this place? After yesterday?”

Jeno shakes his head, corner of his lips twitching. “You’re really overestimating my position here if you think I have any authority to ban anyone.”

“And your friend makes up like 80% of our business, so I’m pretty sure you’d have to actually murder me in plain sight of my manager, before she’d even think about banning either one of you,” he adds.

“That’s good to know,” Renjun says. “So I’ll get going now?”

“You don’t sound too sure about that,” Jeno points out. His face is neutral, but the teasing note in his voice is back.

The fluttering in Renjun’s stomach intensifies. 

He bolts for the door.

* * *

He tries to put the whole thing out of his mind. It’s what you do when faced with a situation that’s as hopeless as it is humiliating - repress, avoid and repress some more. Renjun’s getting good at that. He throws himself into work - finishing a commissioned piece he’s been working on for the past few weeks; tries to stay out of Donghyuck and Jaemin’s arguments (Donghyuck is taking his best man duties very seriously) and helps Chenle pick out a ‘wedding-appropriate’ hair colour (his bathroom sink will never be the same.)

He does not go to the cafe.

Instead, he holes up in his apartment, binges the first two seasons of X-files, episode after episode, until his eyes burn. He goes grocery shopping, has lunch with his cousin. The days fly by in a blur of normality.

Weekends have less meaning when you work from home. His working hours are so erratic, that the days often pass by without Renjun noticing. It takes a text from Jaemin, for him to register that it was a Saturday, and they were all expected at Jisung’s new place by 8pm sharp.

_What did you get him???_

Renjun stares at the text and curses himself for forgetting. 

He trawls through the shops, desperately searching for something, _anything_. 

A few hours later, he finds himself in an unfamiliar corridor, a house plant tucked under one arm, the pot’s ceramic edge digging into his ribs. He’s already regretting his choice of gift - it’s heavy and awkward - and it’ll probably be dead within a week of being placed under Jisung’s care. He should have gone for something more portable, like a gift voucher. Renjun balances the plant on his knee, reaching out with one hand to rap firmly against the door of Jisung’s new apartment. 

He clutches the plant to his chest, waiting patiently for someone to let him in. It feels like hours before the front door finally swings open.

Relief floods through him. “Fucking finally. You really took your time.” he complains. His arm muscles are on fire. “This thing weighs more than I do.” 

He looks up through the plant’s dense green leaves, expecting Jisung or maybe Chenle. Instead he finds himself face to face with the last person he had been expecting to see here.

Renjun almost drops the plant. 

He blinks. Then blinks again, refusing to believe that the universe had it out for him this badly. This had to be some kind of nightmare, and any second now he was going to wake up. He’s waiting for Jeno to dissolve in front of his eyes, but Jeno just stands there, propping the door open with his shoulder, a stunned expression on his face.

It’s not a dream. 

Renjun is the first to recover. “Is this 5A?” He thought he’d had the right apartment, but he hasn't been over to Jisung’s new place before, so he could be wrong. 

Jeno nods slowly.  
Renjun frowns. “Then I must have gotten the address wrong.” He sets down the pot plant, and digs through his pockets, looking for his phone. He’d been sure it was 5A, but even Renjun could be wrong sometimes, and he knows that the address is there, buried somewhere deep in the group chat. 

“Are you one of Jisung’s friends?” 

Renjun raises his head in surprise. It’s the first thing Jeno has said to him since he’d opened the door. “Yeah. Are you his neighbour?”

Jeno shakes his head. “No-”

Dread pools in Renjun’s stomach. “His housemate’s friend?” he tries again, voice hopeful.

“I’m his housemate.” 

Renjun’s saved from having to come up with an answer when Chenle comes barrelling past Jeno, launching himself at Renjun with a force that nearly sends him toppling. 

Immediately, Chenle grabs Renjun’s arm, pulling him into the apartment. “You’re late,” he complains.

“I had to -” Renjun starts to explain his last minute shopping trip, when he suddenly remembers the damned plant. “Wait-” he says, digging his heels into the floor, trying to get Chenle to slow down. “My plant-”

“Jeno can bring it in,” Chenle says cheerfully. “He’s very strong.” Chenle drops his voice low. “Have you seen those muscles?”

Renjun resists the urge to roll his eyes. He’s not blind.

He casts a look over his shoulder, smiling apologetically at Jeno.

Jeno just shrugs, and picks up the pot plant as easily as if it weighs nothing. It is both infuriating and extremely attractive, but luckily Renjun doesn’t have a chance to dwell on that, because Chenle’s grip is tight around his wrist, and he’s being dragged through the packed apartment towards the kitchen, where Jaemin and Donghyuck are already bickering, a resigned looking Mark sandwiched between them.

“Renjun’s here,” Chenle announces quickly, before he disappears to locate Jisung. 

Mark raises his beer in greeting, but Renjun barely has a chance to say anything before Donghyuck throws his arms around him. “Thank god you’re finally here,” he breathes against Renjun’s ear. “We need you.”

Renjun pushes him off. “What do you want”

“Settle something for us,” Donghyuck says. He glares at Jaemin, who’s answering glare is just as fierce. “What would you say is the appropriate ratio of Beyonce to non-Beyonce songs on a wedding playlist?”

Renjun closes his eyes, and sighs. He does not want to get involved in this. “I’d say that it should probably be whatever the groom wants.” 

It’s a safe answer. Jaemin’s face lights up. He punches Donghyuck’s shoulder, brave in his triumph. 

“Even when the groom has shitty taste, while his best man has several Spotify playlists with thousands of followers?” Donghyuck argues, not ready to give up.

Renjun considers Donghyuck’s words. He might have a point - Jaemin’s music taste is notoriously bad.

Mark coughs awkwardly in the background. “I think I’m going to go find Ten. I’m sure I saw him somewhere. I’ll see you guys later.” 

It’s a poor excuse, but Renjun can’t blame him for wanting to make his escape. Mark hates arguments more than anyone he knows. 

Donghyuck’s eyes are glued to Mark’s retreating form. 

Renjun tries not to laugh. “Subtle,” he says. He pushes Donghyuck in the direction that Mark has disappeared in. “Just go. You know you want to.”

Donghyuck doesn’t need much convincing. He gives Jaemin a heated look. “This isn’t over,” he hisses, then takes off after Mark.

It would be funny, if it weren’t so desperately sad. “Do you think they’ll ever get it together?” Renjun muses out loud.

“Probably not,” Jaemin says. “They’ll probably die within a week of one another, in their platonically shared flat, after being single their whole lives, because they’re too scared they’ll ruin their friendship.”

“That’s dark, Jaemin.”

“That’s why you should never fall in love with your best friend, Renjun. Well that, and Hendery would kick your ass.”

Renjun snorts. He grabs a beer from the cooler on the kitchen counter, and twists off the cap. “I think I’m safe if you and Donghyuck are my only choices. I’d rather die alone.” 

He takes a swig of his beer. “Jeno’s here,” Renjun says, after a beat of silence. There’s no segue, no preamble- he just goes right for it. “He’s Jisung’s housemate. What are the chances?”

“I know,” Jaemin says gleefully.

“You are enjoying this way too much. Weren’t you supposed to be on my side?”

“I am on your side,” Jaemin argues. “But you have to admit it’s kind of funny.”

“It’s not,” Renjun snaps. “What am I supposed to do?”

“Act normal?” Jaemin suggests. “I don’t see what the problem is. You went and apologised to him - against my advice - and you say it went fine. So you just need to put it behind you, because it looks as though we’ll be seeing him a lot.”

“It’s not that easy.” 

“Yes it is,” Jaemin insists. “Now, finish your drink, and go say hi to Jisung. I’m going to find the bathroom.” He pats Renjun on the shoulder, and then he’s gone, leaving Renjun alone in the kitchen.

* * *

Renjun only half-listens to Jaemin’s instructions. He finishes his drink, has another one or two (maybe three - he’s not sure anymore). Instead of finding Jisung, Renjun conducts a self-guided tour of Jisung’s apartment (bathroom - nice, clean, spacious shower; fridge - alarmingly empty). He’s just poked his head into one of the kitchen cupboards, when he feels a tap on his shoulder.

Jisung looms over him, eyes narrowed. “What are you doing?”

Renjun isn’t sure he can come up with an answer that will satisfy him. “Why aren’t there any vegetables in your kitchen?” he demands instead.

“You haven’t even come and said hi to me, and yet you’re already judging me,” Jisung complains. He puts his hands on Renjun’s shoulders and pushes him gently out of the kitchen.

“You were busy,” Renjun says. It’s not the whole truth, but it sounds a lot better than ‘I’m avoiding your housemate.’ “I didn’t want to interrupt.”

“Well, I’m not busy now,” Jisung counters. “Let’s find Chenle. He was looking for you before.” Jisung scans the room for his boyfriend. The living room is small but crowded, so it takes him a few moments to locate Chenle’s bright blond head. “There he is,” Jisung says. “He’s over there with Jeno. I’ll introduce you.”

He pulls Renjun behind him, oblivious to the way Renjun stiffens beside him. As they get closer, Renjun sees Chenle hanging off Jeno’s shoulder, laughing at something he said. “Chenle really likes Jeno,” Jisung says cheerfully, but there’s something a little off about his expression.

Renjun stops walking. “You’re not jealous are you?” he asks incredulously. 

Jisung’s cheeks grow pink. He loosens his grip on Renjun’s arm. “No.” he denies. “Not like that anyway. I just… want his attention all the time,” he admits reluctantly. He refuses to look at Renjun.

Renjun laughs. He doesn’t mean to, it just bursts out of him. “You are so cute,” he says, pulling Jisung towards him. “But also ridiculous, because it’s obvious to anyone that Chenle only has eyes for you.”

Renjun takes a deep breath, already knowing he was going to regret this, but the alcohol he’d consumed in the kitchen, and his stupid affection for Jisung, made him brave. “Let’s go,” he says. He takes Jisung by the arm, and guides him over to where Chenle and Jeno are standing. 

The second that Jisung and Renjun join them, Chenle detaches himself from Jeno, and wraps himself around Jisung, hooking his chin over Jisung’s shoulder.

Renjun gives Jisung a pointed look - a silent _I told you so_. Jisung ignores him, just leans back into Chenle, a contented smile working its way onto his face.

Renjun bites the inside of his cheek.. 

Chenle looks up at Renjun, a mischievous look on his face. “Renjun! I was looking for you,” he says excitedly. “You haven’t met Jeno yet.”

The words are innocent, yet Renjun’s body goes on high alert. 

“Actually, we met at the door,” Renjun says warily.

“That barely counts,” Chenle dismisses. “Did you know Jeno and you are the same age?” he continues, as though Renjun hadn't spoken. “Isn’t that interesting?”

If Chenle weren’t still wrapped around Jisung, like some kind of humanoid octopus, Renjun would have elbowed him right in the stomach. But he can’t because Jisung’s in the way, and he could never hurt sweet lovely Jisung.

“Lots of people are the same age,” Renjun says carefully.

“Riiight,” Jisung says slowly, as if he’s only just realised something. His eyes widen, deceptively innocent. “And you also both like watching movies. And staying at home.”

Renjun narrows his eyes. Betrayed again. You really couldn’t trust anyone.

Chenle releases Jisung, and slips behind Renjun instead, his hands a firm pressure on Renjun’s shoulders, gently but determinedly pushing him closer to Jeno. “Renjun is so great,” Chenle says nonchalantly. It’s an act, and Renjun is sure Jeno can see right through it. “Sure, he’s kind of scrawny,” he continues, “-but he’s very funny. Nice, even when he pretends not to be. He can cook, and clean. Even has his own apartment - with no housemates. Very private.”

“Ok?” Jeno says slowly.

Renjun wants the earth to split apart and swallow him. He is going to kill Chenle. 

Chenle gives Jisung a significant look. “Ji, we should go check on that thing in the kitchen.”

Jisung looks confused for a moment, but then his face clears. “Yes,” he says slowly. “The thing. We should… go do that.” He shoots Renjun an encouraging look and follows Chenle towards the kitchen.

It’s about as subtle as Chenle’s hair. 

Renjun glances toward Jeno, and decides to do the only thing he can. 

He’s going to act normal.

He wrinkles his nose. “Why did that sound like he was trying to auction me off?”

Jeno’s face relaxes. He shrugs. “It did sound kind of like a sales pitch,” he says. “But if it makes you feel better, it was a pretty good one.”

Renjun’s stomach flips. He’s not sure how to respond to that.

Silence stretches between them, and Renjun’s resolution to act normal crumbles as quickly as he’d made it. He swallows. “Is this weird for you?”

“It wasn’t until you asked me that.”

Renjun’s neck prickles. The room feels suddenly hot. “I'm sorry. I should go,” Renjun says quickly.

“You don’t have to.”

It’s not the response Renjun expects. He forces himself to look at Jeno, tries to work out what game he’s playing, but Jeno’s face is open, sincere.

“You don’t have to go,” Jeno repeats. “And things don’t have to be weird between us. You should forget about it. I already have.”

“How am I supposed to even look at you?” Renjun asks. He sounds pitiful. “It’s so embarrassing.”

Jeno considers this for a moment. He looks so serious, that Renjun can’t help but find himself completely endeared. Then his face brightens, and he smiles, careful and tentative. “Start with having a drink.”

Renjun feels his lips curl into a grin. It’s not the worst idea.

He follows Jeno toward the kitchen.

* * *

Twenty minutes later Renjun is feeling pleasantly buzzed. They’ve commandeered the kitchen table, and Jeno’s snagged a bottle of rum and a couple of shot glasses. Donghyuck and Jaemin had wandered into the kitchen somewhere between drinks three and four - Renjun can’t quite remember. Jaemin had taken in the sight of him and Jeno, and gaped wide-eyed and speechless for at least five seconds, before he’d taken a seat at the table, dragging Donghyuck down with him. Renjun knows how it looks, him and Jeno hidden away in the kitchen, sitting close enough that their knees touch, but it’s not like that, and he doesn’t need Jaemin’s judgy eyes judging him.

It’s weird how easy the conversation flows between them, almost as if Jeno was always meant to be one of them. They’re all the same age - Jeno’s older than both Jaem and Hyuck, but exactly one month younger than Renjun - and their personalities mesh well with one another. If Jaemin’s instant attachment is anything to go by, Jeno is well on the way to becoming a permanent fixture in their little friend group.

After the fourth drink, Renjun finds that he doesn’t mind.

“You, Lee Jeno,” Donghyuck slurs, clapping a hand on Jeno’s shoulder, “-are very nice. I’m glad you’re Jisung’s housemate. I was worried he’d end up with a monster.”

Jeno flushes at the praise. “Thanks I guess,” he says, with an awkward shake of his head.

Jaemin looks around the apartment. “How do you even afford this? It’s so much bigger than my place.”

“The rent is actually very reasonable,” Jeno says.

“Why?” Jaemin demands. The alcohol has brought a flush of pink to Jaemin’s cheeks, and his eyes look glassy. “Was someone murdered here?”

Jeno pales. “Please don't tell Jisung.”

Jaemin blinks. “What?”

“Nothing,” Jeno says quickly. His eyes dart around in panic. “Anyway” he says awkwardly, “Not that I don’t like Jisung as my housemate, but I’ve been curious about why he doesn’t just move in with Chenle? He’s over here enough.” 

Donghyuck snorts. “Yeah, that’s how they get you.”

Jeno tilts his head in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Well, right now, Chenle is working for his parent’s company, and he’s getting paid in ‘experience’-”

Jeno nods. “So… nothing?”

“Exactly. He can't afford to move out. But if Jisung moves in with a gullible housemate like you, you end up paying half the rent, and Chenle’s here pretty much all the time. Slowly, you forget that he doesn’t actually live here, and those two get to live together, while you end up covering half the bills. Think about it.”

“I don’t believe that.” Jeno looks aghast at the idea. “They’re not capable of being that manipulative.”

Renjun pats Jeno’s cheek. “Oh Jeno. That’s exactly how they get you.”

“I don’t believe it,” Jeno repeats, then he shrugs. “But even if it’s true, I don’t really mind. They’re cute.” 

Jaemin’s eyes light up. “ Jisung _is_ so cute, isn’t he?”

“He is,” Jeno nods. “But I think Chenle is even cuter than Jisung.”

The grin drops off Jaemin’s face, and his expression goes disturbingly blank. He pushes himself up off his seat, and eyes Jeno coldly. “I think this friendship has run its course.”

Then he’s gone.

Jeno looks at Renjun in shock. “Did I say something?”

Renjun tries not to laugh at the panicked look in Jeno’s eyes. “You’re fine,” he assures Jeno. “It’s just that Jisung is his favourite, and he takes it very seriously. But he’s drunk and dramatic, so you definitely don’t need to worry about it.”

A few minutes later, Mark slips into the kitchen, an unamused look on his face. He takes in the mess of glasses on the table, the empty bottle of rum, and half finished vodka. He turns to Donghyuck. “I thought you said you were going to take it easy tonight.”

“I am taking it easy, Mark,” Donghyuck retorts. “Why do you even care?”

“Because you specifically told me not to let you drink,” Mark snaps. “Did you forget about that?”

“Past-Donghyuck didn’t know what he was talking about,” Donghyuck tells him, poking hard at Mark’s chest.

Mark swats his hand away. “And future-Donghyuck is going to be pissed at me if I don’t follow his instructions. We're going home.” He pulls Donghyuck up from his seat, and wraps an arm around his waist, to hold him steady. Donghyuck groans in annoyance, but doesn’t fight it. He clings to Mark, nestling his head into Mark’s shoulder. “You coming as well, Jun?”

“No, I’m ok.”

Mark shrugs. He nods at Jeno and Renjun. “Then we’ll see you guys later.” 

He guides Donghyuck out of the kitchen, knees buckling under Donghyuck’s dead weight.

Renjun looks over at Jeno. He’s watching Mark and Donghyuck, eyes gleaming with curiosity. “Are they-?”

Renjun sighs. “It’s complicated.” 

There’s a beat of silence, and Renjun is suddenly, acutely aware that he’s alone with Jeno. 

Jeno must have the same revelation because he’s shifting away from Renjun, creating space between them that wasn’t there before. He glances at Renjun. “Are you sure you don’t want to go with them?” Jeno asks.

Renjun thinks about it for a second, then shakes his head. “Honestly, I don’t really think I can stand right now.” He gestures to the leftover alcohol. “Let’s keep this going.”

“If you can’t stand, then should you really be drinking more?” Jeno sounds concerned. It’s cute, but also annoying. He can take care of himself.

“I’m fine,” Renjun snorts. “Also I’m older than you, so don’t you dare try to baby me or I will flick you so hard you’ll see stars.”

“I’m not trying to baby you,” Jeno protests. “But you’re small, and you’ve drunk a lot already.”

“Worry about yourself,” Renjun dismisses. “Now, let’s play a drinking game. Truth or drink.”

Renjun pours them each a shot of vodka. It’s not his favourite drink, but it’ll do. “You first.”

“Um...what do you do? As a job?”

Renjun frowns. Boring. “I’m a freelance graphics designer. I also do some illustrating on the side.” He considers his own question carefully. “Why did you forgive me so easily?”

“I don’t know. You seemed sincerely sorry?”

“Or you’re just a pushover?”

Jeno’s lip twitches. “Could be that.”

Renjun feels something warm stir in his chest. He likes how Jeno doesn’t get offended, just accepts his teasing with a smile. He does his best to ignore the feeling. “Your turn,” he says quickly.

Jeno’s forehead creases in concentration. “Any childhood pets?”

“A cat called Sniffles.”

“I love cats. I have three back home.” Jeno tells him excitedly.

“No wonder you like Chenle so much,” Renjun teases. It’s nice how Jeno’s questions are so simple, innocently curious rather than aimed at drawing out his most embarrassing experiences, but this isn’t the point of the game, and Renjun’s ready for things to get more interesting. Someone has to be the first to break that barrier. His mouth curves into something wicked. “Most humiliating sexual experience?”

Jeno’s cheeks burn crimson. He grabs for the shot and knocks it back without hesitation. 

Renjun’s a little disappointed that he doesn’t get to hear the answer, but there’s something satisfying about Jeno’s reaction. He waits eagerly for Jeno’s revenge. 

“How did you meet Jisung?”

Renjun answers the question easily, frowning.

“Where’s the weirdest place you’ve ever had sex?”

Jeno just swallows hard, and takes another shot. “Favourite movie and why?”

Renjun’s frown deepens. 

It goes on like this for a while, the two of them trading questions - Renjun’s increasingly more invasive ( _favourite category on pornhub; if you had to kiss someone here tonight, who would it be?_ ), Jeno’s the same easy, friendly questions as before.

Renjun doesn’t get it. Is Jeno really so boring that he can’t come up with anything better? He eyes Jeno suspiciously. Jeno’s posture is getting progressively looser, his eyes shinier, and there’s a telltale flush spreading down his neck. And then suddenly he knows.

Renjun narrows his eyes. “You’re doing this on purpose,” he says slowly. “Giving me these boring questions so that I don’t need to drink.”

Jeno looks up at him through half-lidded eyes. “Don’t know what you’re talking about,” he mumbles.

“Then give me a proper question,” Renjun demands. “Otherwise you’re a liar.” 

Jeno sighs.

“Come on. This game is no fun unless there’s a risk,” Renjun complains. He’s sobering up quickly, and it’s exactly the opposite of where he wants to be right now. He’s still not confident he can handle Jeno sober. He fixes Jeno with a pleading look. “Don’t be a coward. Give me a challenge, Jeno.”

Jeno sighs again, but this time it’s resigned and Renjun knows he’s won. 

“Why did you break up with your last boyfriend?”

Renjun’s throat goes dry. 

He reaches for his glass.

* * *

Renjun feels sluggish. There’s no logic to the thoughts bouncing around his head, pinballing around the inside of his skull, no connecting thread between them.

He feels good - loose and warm.

Renjun is not drunk. But he’s also not not drunk. He’s just functional enough to know that sitting here like this, pressed up against Jeno’s side, one leg thrown over his thigh, is probably not a good idea, but not sober enough to pull away. It’s just that Jeno is solid and nice, and while sober-Renjun had acted like a complete fool in front of him, drunk-Renjun carries none of that baggage.

Baggage is heavy. Heavy things are not good. 

...the plant had been heavy. 

_The plant..._

He turns suddenly to Jeno, hands gripping Jeno’s black shirt, pulling him closer. Jeno lets out a puff of breath, surprised by Renjun’s sudden assault.

“Jeno,” he says desperately. “I need you to promise me something.”

“Um... ok?”

“The plant,” Renjun blurts out. “The plant that I bought for Jisung. Jisung’s plant. You know the one?” Renjun’s grasp on Jeno’s shirt tightens. He doesn’t know why this is suddenly so important to him, only that it is. “You have to take care of it. He’s going to kill it. I know it. Please don’t let it die.”

Jeno blinks. “Ok,” he says. “I can do that. I promise I won’t let it die.”

Renjun’s head spins. “Thank you,” he breathes. Jeno nods, and he looks so earnest and serious, that Renjun could kiss him.

So he does.

It’s not much, just the brief press of dry lips, but instantly Renjun is aware of the wrongness of it. He shouldn’t be kissing Jeno, has no right to, because Jeno does not want to be kissed by him. 

Jeno will never want to be kissed by him.

Renjun pulls away, can’t bring himself to look at Jeno, to see the disgust on his face.

“Bathroom,” he mumbles, his face hot with shame, then he turns, and stumbles out of the room.

This is starting to feel like a pattern.

* * *

“You and Jeno looked very cozy last night,” Jisung says, eyebrow waggling suggestively.

“I knew you would get along,” Chenle says smugly.

Renjun’s head throbs and he doesn’t know why he allowed himself to be dragged out for breakfast by his two newest archnemeses. It would have been a bad idea even if it weren’t for the hangover. But Chenle had offered to pay, and nothing tastes better than free.

“We weren’t getting along,” Renjun says, viciously stabbing at his egg, as though it had personally wronged him. 

“You were in his lap,” Jisung points out. “I saw it with my own eyes.”

“That was the alcohol,” Renjun says. It comes out more defensive than he intends. “You know I get clingy when I drink.”

Chenle makes a noise of disbelief. “Since when?”

“Since always,” Renjun snaps. He looks down at his breakfast, no longer hungry. He takes a breath. “Did Jaemin say something to you - about Jeno?”

Jisung frowns. “No. Why? Does he know Jeno?”

“No,” Renjun says quickly. “But then, why do you keep trying to throw me at him?”

“Because he’s nice, and nice to look at?” Chenle says, through a mouthful of toast. “And you deserve someone like that.”

He says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Renjun buries his head in his hands. “Ugh,” he groans. “Why do you make it so hard to stay mad at you?”

“Did you not like Jeno?” Jisung asks him, his face scrunched up in confusion. “We thought you would.”

Renjun sighs. “It’s not that I didn’t like him.” 

“Then what?”

“It’s complicated,” Renjun says. “I was an idiot. Several times over.” He pushes his fork through his food, drawing a trail of yolk along the rim of the plate. “So please don’t interfere anymore. You’re just going to make it worse.”

“Fine,” Chenle says finally. “We’ll back off.”

“Thank you.”

“For now.”

* * *

“I don’t want to go for coffee,” Renjun complains. He’s regretting opening the door for Jaemin. Once a pest gets in, it’s impossible to get out.

“You’re going,” Jaemin says firmly, plucking Renjun’s jacket from the couch, and tossing it at him. “I’m feeling caffeine deprived and I want to say hi to Jeno. Do you think he has an employee discount?”

“No, and also you don’t need me for any of that.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to drink coffee by myself. As my best friend it’s your job to keep me company while I caffeinate.”

Renjun scoffs. It’s an underhanded tactic, but Renjun can give as good as he gets. “If I was your best friend,” he points out, “ you would have chosen me to be your best man, but no, that’s Donghyuck.”

Jaemin squawks indignantly. He narrows his eyes at Renjun. “I did ask you, and you said you weren’t going to be my glorified servant.”

“I was being dramatic!”

Jaemin freezes, the fire going out of him. “Wait..Did you actually want to be my best man?”

“No,” Renjun says. “Not really. ”

Jaemin closes his eyes, breathes deeply through his nose. After a moment, his posture relaxes, and he looks like he’s ready to deal with Renjun again. “Then you don’t need to be so difficult,” Jaemin tells him. “Put on your jacket and let’s go.”

“You are really bad at picking up on hints, Jaem,” Renjun says. He can’t believe how tone-deaf Jaemin is being. “Can’t you tell I don’t want to go there with you?”

Jaemin frowns. “Why?”

“I just don’t want to see Jeno,” Renjun admits. “I may have done something stupid again.”

“So what? It can’t be worse than the other thing you did,” Jaemin says reasonably.

“It might be,” Renjun argues.

“Not possible,” Jaemin reassures him. “And the longer you leave things the more awkward it’ll become.”

“I guess,” Renjun says doubtfully.

“You’re going to have to see him eventually. Like it or not, he’s kind of tangled up with us now, being Jisung’s housemate and all. Might as well get it over with.” 

Jaemin makes sense. Renjun hates him for it. He reluctantly shrugs on his jacket. “Fine. But you’re paying.”

“Deal,” Jaemin says. He places his hands on Renjun’s shoulders, and gently pushes him out the door.

* * *

Jaemin greets Jeno like they’re old friends. It surprises Renjun considering the last time they’d talked Jaemin had stalked off in anger, that Jeno could possibly find anyone cuter than Jisung. Jeno seems equally surprised, if his face is anything to go by.

Once Jaemin rattles off his order, Jeno turns to Renjun, and Renjun must be seeing things because Jeno’s smiling brightly at him. It’s weird and unexpected, and Renjun doesn’t understand it.. “Anything for you, Renjun?” 

“Just a green tea, please,” Renjun tells him. “And add it to Jaemin’s order.” 

“Ok. You can grab a table, and I’ll bring your order out.”

Renjun hangs back when Jaemin goes off to take over their usual booth. “Do you have a second?”

Jeno frowns. “Is something wrong?”

“I just need to apologise to you. For what happened at Jisung’s housewarming,” Renjun says quickly. 

Jeno’s frown deepens. “What do you mean?”

Renjun stares at him, unblinking. “For - you know-” he sputters awkwardly. He can’t say it, didn’t think he’d have to.

“Apparently not,” Jeno points out. “I don’t remember you doing or saying anything you need to apologise for. We drank and hung out with your friends. It was fun.”

“Is that all you remember?” He examines Jeno, looking for a trace of deception, but he finds none. Either Jeno is the world’s best actor, or he’s telling the truth.

“What else was there?”

Renjun can’t believe it. It’s too good to be true. Sure, Jeno had been drinking, but so had Renjun, and yet he remembered everything in crystalline detail. Maybe Jeno had just been better at hiding how far gone he’d truly been.

Either way, Renjun can finally breathe. 

“Nothing,” he says finally. There’s no point in bringing up the kiss that never should have happened. Jeno’s better off not knowing.

Jeno raises an eyebrow. “Ok,” he says slowly. “If you say so.” He doesn’t look convinced, but he doesn’t push. “You’re coming over tomorrow night though? Jisung said you were.”

“Yeah I am,” Renjun says. He’s surprised Jeno knows about Jisung’s plans. He hadn’t realised they’d gotten so close already. 

“Cool,” Jeno says, and he looks like he means it. “It was nice of him to offer to cook for me as well. I never expected that from a housemate.”

Renjun snorts. “You only think he’s being nice because you’ve never tasted Jisung’s cooking. You should know that he’s only using the both of us as guinea pigs to test out his recipes before he feeds them to Chenle.”

Jeno shrugs. “Still nice.” 

“You won’t be saying that tomorrow,” Renjun warns.

“I don’t know,” Jeno says, passing over Jaemin’s Americano, and Renjun’s tea. “I think it’ll be a good time.”

Jeno smiles. “See you around, Renjun.”

Jeno’s smile is so warm, he melts a little. Renjun nods dumbly, turns on his heel and starts walking mechanically towards the back of the shop, where Jaemin is waiting impatiently for his fresh cup of battery-acid.

He needs to get a grip. 

* * *

“How bad is it?” Jeno asks. leaning over to whisper in Renjun’s ear. Jeno’s breath is hot against his neck, and Renjun can barely suppress the shudder that runs through his body.

“It’s not… the most authentic taste,” Renjun whispers back. He struggles to swallow the mouthful of meat - it’s unpleasantly chewy, with an odd aftertaste that Renjun can’t identify. It makes him nervous. 

“But is it edible?”

Renjun considers the question, then shakes his head. “Don’t risk it,” he tells Jeno. “Wait for the pancake. It’s probably safer.”

They’re crammed at the kitchen table again, an array of Chinese dishes laid out in front of them. Though Renjun thinks that calling any of them ‘Chinese food’ is an insult to his home country. Jisung’s busy cooking, his back towards them, getting ready to serve up another one of his creations. He doesn’t seem to hear anything over the sizzling of oil and the hiss of steam.

“I thought you were exaggerating,” Jeno says. “But there was an egg’s-worth of shell in the egg drop soup. He tried to put aluminium foil in the microwave.”

Renjun tries not to laugh at the pure horror on Jeno’s face. “Jisung’s good at a lot of things, but cooking is not one of them.”

“I can see that,” Jeno murmurs. “It’s sweet that he tries though. Chenle’s lucky.”

“That’s one way of looking at it.”

Jeno slaps playfully at Renjun’s shoulder. “Stop pretending like you don’t think it’s cute. It’s not fooling anyone.”

“Fine,” Renjun admits reluctantly. “But I still don’t think he should be feeding this to anyone.”

“What should we do?”

Renjun weighs up their options. “Be honest?”

Jeno looks doubtful. “Any other ideas?”

Renjun’s about to answer, when a dish of what he assumes are dumplings is slammed down in front of him. Jisung looms over the table. “So… did you like it?” he asks timidly. He looks both nervous and hopeful, and Renjun’s resolve to be honest crumbles instantly. How can he when Jisung is looking at him like that?

“It was really good, Jisung-ah,” he says, forcing his lips into a smile.

Beside him, Jeno makes a small noise of surprise. Renjun knocks his ankle against Jeno’s - a warning.

“Really?” 

“Definitely,” Jeno says quickly.

Jisung glances between them. “Then why don’t you finish off the chicken?” he suggests.

The fear on Jeno’s face is obvious. “Which one’s the chicken again?” he mumbles, not meeting Jisung’s eyes.

Jisung wilts. “I knew it.” He pulls out a chair, and slips into it. He slumps forward, and lays his head onto folded arms, raising his gaze to meet Renjun’s. “Was it really that bad?”

“Well...It wasn’t good,” Renjun says gently. “I think this was beyond your current skill level.”

“I just wanted to do something for Chenle,” Jisung says sadly. “To remind him of home.”

Renjun reaches out to pet Jisung’s head. “You don’t need to do that, because you’re his home,” he says fondly, carding through Jisung’s hair. It’s silky beneath his fingertips.

Jisung’s head jerks up. “I can’t believe you said that.”

“I can’t believe it either,” Renjun says. He’s not sure which one of them is more embarrassed. But his words still stand. “Chenle doesn’t mind that you’re useless in the kitchen. You don’t have to give him food poisoning to show you care.”

Jisung rolls his eyes. “Thanks so much.”

“Let’s just clean up this mess and order something in, ok?”

“Actually,” Jisung glances down at his wrist. “I’m supposed to meet Jaemin in like half an hour. Something about the wedding. So I’ll wash up when I get back.” 

Renjun scoffs. He knows all of Jisung’s tricks.

“I’m serious,” Jisung insists. “Don’t touch anything.”

* * *

Ten minutes later, Jisung’s gone, and Renjun isn’t sure what to do with himself. 

He sips slowly at the tea Jeno has prepared for him (“to settle your stomach”), and watches Jeno potter around the kitchen. It’s not awkward exactly, it just feels strange to be in Jisung’s apartment, without Jisung there. 

“I didn’t realise you were such a romantic,” Jeno says, his words pulling Renjun out of his own head. Jeno’s on his knees, head deep in one of the cabinets, and his voice comes out muffled.

“What are you talking about?”

Jeno gets up off his knees, brushing the dust off his jeans. He holds up the box of steel wool he’d managed to retrieve from the cupboard, and grins. There’s a hint of mischief in his eyes. “You don’t need to do anything,” he mimics. “Because you’re his home.”

Renjun’s cheeks flame. “Shut up.”

“It’s just so embarrassing,” Jeno teases, dumping a pile of dishes into the sink. “You’re secretly soft.”

“Shut up,” Renjun says. “I’m bitter and cynical-”

Jeno turns away, pulling on a pair of bright pink rubber gloves. “I think it’s nice,” Jeno says carefully, pouring dishwashing liquid onto a sponge.

“Oh.” Renjun doesn’t know how to respond to that.

He watches Jeno scrub vigorously at the burnt bottom of a pan. “I think that one is beyond saving,” Renjun says quietly. “You shouldn’t even be doing that, it’s Jisung’s mess, he should be the one to clean it.”

Jeno shrugs, elbow-deep in soap suds. “I don’t mind. It’ll start to smell otherwise.”

Renjun sighs, and hops off his chair. “You are such a pushover,” he mutters, loud enough for Jeno to hear. “Where do you keep the gloves?”

It takes them the better part of an hour to get the kitchen into some kind of order. 

Renjun’s exhausted. He’s about to make his excuses, and head off, when Jeno turns to him. “If you’re not too tired, did you want to put on a movie?” He’s drying his hands on a dishtowel, and there’s a hopeful note in his voice.

Renjun’s exhausted, but Jeno’s looking at him expectantly. There’s only one thing he can do.

He nods. “Sure.”

Jeno’s face relaxes, his body flooded with relief. 

* * *

They end up watching some old sci-fi movie that Jeno’s friend had left playing on the tv. Renjun settles into the couch while Jeno fiddles with the remote, restarting the movie from the beginning. He dims the lights, and sinks down next to Renjun.

Renjun doesn’t really pay much attention to the movie, his eyelids feel heavy. He’s had a long day - there was a consultation with a new client, the loss of a critical file, and now Jisung’s disastrous cooking experiment. He hadn’t been sleeping well either, and Jeno’s couch is very comfortable.

Being with Jeno is comfortable, Renjun realises.

He’s not in love with him. That would be ridiculous. He hardly knows him. But it’s useless to pretend that he doesn’t feel a magnetic pull towards him. He likes how nice Jeno is. How calming and steady. He likes how he lets Renjun tease him without taking it too seriously, but stands up for himself when he needs to. He likes how surprisingly funny Jeno is. He likes Jeno’s face, and his ridiculous body. He likes how warm Jeno’s arm is, pressed up against his…

Renjun’s eyes flutter closed.

He wakes to a gentle pressure on his shoulder. 

“Renjun…”

Renjun opens his eyes to find Jeno peering down at him. His face is closer than it should be.

“You should have said that you were tired,” Jeno reproaches. “You weren’t even watching.”

Renjun yawns. “I am watching.”

“Then what just happened?”

“They put the chip in that guy’s brain,” Renjun tells him smugly. 

Jeno rolls his eyes. “That happened like an hour ago.”

“Still counts as watching,” Renjun tells him. He’s slowly coming back to himself. His stomach drops when he realises how close he’d gotten to Jeno. Renjun’s curled up against Jeno’s side, knee digging into Jeno’s thigh. He tries not to panic. Slowly, he pulls away, shifting away towards his own side of the couch.

“Sorry, I slept on you,” he says, running a hand through his hair.

“I didn’t mind.”

Renjun’s not sure what to make of that, but it probably doesn’t mean anything. It’s just Jeno being Jeno.

He glances at his watch. It’s past midnight. He hadn’t anticipated staying that long, and he had an important Skype call scheduled for the morning. “I should probably get going,” he says, getting up off the couch, and stretching out his stiff body.

Jeno nods. “I’ll walk you out.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Renjun argues.

“It’s like three steps,” Jeno laughs, placing a hand on the small of Renjun’s back, and guiding him towards the door. “I think I can handle it.”

Renjun’s skin prickles through the material of his thin jumper.

He’s not sure he can.

* * *

**unknown number:**  
_hey, you left your jacket here._

Renjun frowns at the text. 

_Who’s this?_

**Unknown number:**  
_Sorry. it’s jeno  
jisung told me to text you_

A few seconds later, Renjun’s phone pings with another message.

_hope that’s ok_

_yeah, that’s fine._ Renjun taps out in answer. _Can I drop by around 6?_

**unknown number:**  
_Sure! Someone will be here :)_

Renjun stares at the smiling emoji, and only feels a little guilty when he saves Jeno’s number. Just in case.

* * *

When Jisung opens the door, Renjun isn’t sure whether to feel relieved or disappointed. 

“Jeno’s not here yet,” Jisung announces, as soon as Renjun steps into the apartment. 

Renjun coughs. “Why would I care? I’m just here for my jacket.”

Jisung snorts. “Cut the crap. I have eyes. I saw the snuggling.”

“No idea what you’re talking about,” Renjun says. “You saw nothing.”

“Right,” Jisung says, flinging Renjun’s jacket at him. “I know what I saw. Walked in, had to walk right out. Though it was kind of sweet in a gross way. ”

Renjun hears Chenle’s voice from the kitchen. “Hey, don’t talk to Renjun like that. He’ll get shy.”

“There’s nothing to get shy about,” Renjun calls back. “Leave me alone.”

“Whatever you say.” 

Chenle’s head pops out of the kitchen. “You should stay for dinner.” 

Renjun’s gaze darts nervously towards Jisung.

“Jisung will be observing only,” Chenle reassures him. Jisung sticks out his tongue at his boyfriend like he’s twelve.

It’s tempting, but Renjun has a lot of work to be getting on with. He should probably just go home.

“I’m making stir-fried bok choy,” Chenle adds.

On the other hand, he needs to eat, and his own fridge stands depressingly empty. Maybe he just loves Chenle’s bok choy.

“Fine,” he sighs, treading the now-familiar path into the kitchen. He throws his jacket over the back of a chair. He’s going to regret this tomorrow when he has twice the work to do, but, blah blah blah you only live once. “I’ll put on the rice.”

Jeno doesn’t get back till after eight. They’ve already finished eating - Chenle is in the living room, powering up the TV for their Mario Kart tournament, and Renjun is rinsing off his plate, when Jeno steps through the door. His cheeks are pink from the cold, a dark green scarf knotted around his neck. He smiles when he sees Renjun, “You’re still here.”

“They never let me leave,” Renjun says with a shrug.

Jisung snorts. “It’s not like you try that hard.” He turns to Jeno. “There’s some leftover rice and stir-fry, if you want it. Chenle made way too much again.” 

“Thanks.” 

“And we’re going to play Mario Kart. Join if you want,” Jisung adds, hopefully.

“Maybe I will,” Jeno says, unwinding his scarf and draping it across a chair.

Jisung shrugs, like he doesn’t care either way. But Renjun knows him better than that - he wouldn’t have suggested it if he hadn't wanted for Jeno to hang out with them. Jisung moves towards the living room. “You coming Renjun?”

“Yeah, in a second,” Renjun tells him, watching Jeno pull out a bowl.

“Do you want company?” Renjun asks hesitantly, once Jisung has disappeared from the room. He’s not sure why he asks, only that he hates eating alone, and he wonders if Jeno is the same.

Jeno seems both surprised and pleased by Renjun’s offer. He nods eagerly. “Please.”

Jeno sets down his food, and Renjun slips into the seat across from him. “How was work?”

“It was ok,” Jeno tells him, through a mouthful of rice. “Had one customer yell at me because I spelled his name wrong. But apart from that, it was pretty boring.”

“There’s always one.”

“Yeah,” Jeno agrees. His eyes are soft. “Yeah, there is.”

Renjun swallows hard. This feels so domestic - him sitting here watching Jeno eat, asking about his day. He shouldn’t like it as much as he does. He clears his throat. “You should come play Mario with us,” he says, voice a little raspy, as if he hadn’t spoken for a while. “Jisung would like that. He seems to really like you.”

“Are you sure about that?” Jeno frowns. “I couldn’t tell.”

“That’s just Jisung,” Renjun assures him. 

“Well that’s nice to know,” Jeno says. “I like him too.” He pauses. “I really like all of you.”

There’s a tightness in Renjun’s chest. “I’m glad.” Under the table, Renjun feels Jeno’s knee knock lightly against his. He waits for him to pull it back, but he doesn’t. Jeno’s knee rests against his, the weight of it solid and comforting. Renjun’s heart stammers in his chest, and it takes everything not to jerk away. 

He slowly raises his gaze to meet Jeno’s. Jeno’s ears are flushed, but his expression is open and steady. There’s no tension between them, just a heaviness that Renjun is trying hard not to read into.

It’s too much to have Jeno looking at him like that. Renjun feels overwhelmed with it. He inhales sharply. “Are you done yet?” Renjun blurts out. “Ready to face your destruction?”

* * *

Renjun should never have agreed to this. Mario Kart brings out the worst in him - he is both fiercely competitive, and a really bad player. It’s not a good combination, and things will not end well for anyone.

“Come on,” he groans, pitching his controller at the couch. He’s come in twelfth for the fourth time in a row, and Renjun has had enough. 

Jeno picks up the offensive controller and hands it back to Renjun. “Relax,” he laughs, taking in Renjun’s indignant expression. “It’s just for fun.”

Jisung sighs deeply. “Him and Chenle are such sore losers.”

“Winning is everything,” Renjun says firmly. Chenle nods emphatically from where he’s seated on the floor, pressed against Jisung’s legs.

“I didn’t know you were so competitive,” Jeno says. “Maybe I should have let you win.”

Renjun hums in agreement. “You still can. It’s what a good friend would do,” he says seriously.

Eyes sparkling, Jeno leans over to him. “I don’t know,” he says, voice just loud enough for Renjun to hear. Jeno’s breath tickles his ear, and Renjun feels embarrassingly warm. “I kind of like seeing you this riled up.”

He leans away, smiling to himself, as Chenle picks out the next track.

Renjun’s racing times have never been worse.

* * *

It starts like this:

Renjun is in the middle of a job - some graphics for a local dog salon. He browses the internet for some inspiration - not everyone can look at dog pictures on the internet and call it work. There’s a cute pomeranian, and adorable poodle, a husky. He scrolls down and freezes. 

Samoyed. 

It’s cute. 

It kind of reminds him of Jeno with his smiley eyes. 

But the body is not quite right. 

It takes him all of about ten minutes to photoshop the samoyed’s head onto the body of a Dobermann. 

He hesitates for a moment, then opens up his messages. 

It’s fine. They’re friends now.

He attaches the photo. _You_ , he adds underneath, hesitates for a moment, then presses send.

He gets a reply within minutes.

He totally doesn’t care.

* * *

It becomes a regular thing - the trading of messages. Jeno complains about Jisung never doing the dishes ( _I did them one time!! And now he thinks it’ll be like that every time_. Renjun texts back an amused _I told you so!_ ) Renjun regales him with tales from the saga of Mark and Donghyuck ( _Mark came home with a sprained wrist and Donghyuck yelled at him for ten minutes, then went to the chemist and bought him three different types of sling._ ) 

It’s nice to have someone new to talk to. Even better that it’s Jeno.

Jaemin doesn’t seem to think so. “Who is texting you so much?” he huffs, after the third time Renjun’s phone pings. 

“No one,” Renjun says, quickly tapping out a response, while shielding the screen from Jaemin’s prying eyes. 

“Let me see,” he whines. “I’m usually the only one who texts you.”

“That’s not even a little bit true,” Renjun tells him. “But if you must know. It’s just Jeno.”

“Oh,” Jaemin smirks. “ _Just_ Jeno.”

Renjun groans. “Don’t start with that. We’re friends.”

“Mmm,” Jaemin hums. “I believe you.”

Renjun feels his cheeks heat. “Shut up,” he snaps. 

Jaemin’s grin wavers. “Hey, I’m not teasing you,” he says. “I think it’s nice. You should invite him out with us on Friday.”

Renjun blinks. “But that’s your unofficial bucks night…”

“So?” Jaemin shrugs. “We’re just going drinking. There’ll be other people there. Hendery’s invited like three of his cousins and I’ve never met any of them. What’s one more person?” Jaemin pauses. “Besides, I like Jeno.”

“I don’t know,” Renjun says slowly, but he swipes open his messaging app, fingers hovering over Jeno’s name. He hesitates for a moment, thinks about not doing it, but the look Jaemin gives him is so expectant and encouraging it would feel like disappointing his own mother.

_Hey Jeno, We’re all going out on Friday. You should come if you want. Let me know and I’ll text you the details :)_

* * *

Renjun isn’t a big fan of clubs and bars. He likes them even less when he’s sober.

The music pounds in his ears. Renjun takes a sip of his lemon lime bitters. Beside him, Jaemin orders enough alcohol to floor several men twice his size. 

He leans over to Renjun, grinning widely. “I wanted to talk to you before I get wasted,” he announces. He casts a searching glance across the club. “Where’s Jeno?”

“He went to the bathroom,” Renjun says casually. “What do you want to talk about?”

“I think you should invite him to the wedding,” Jaemin says simply.

Renjun freezes. “Excuse me?”

Jaemin shrugs. “Jeno. Invite him.”

“Because that went so well the first time.”

Jaemin rolls his eyes. “That was different. You know him now. And it’s obvious he likes you. He’s been following you around like a lost puppy all night.”

“That’s only because he doesn’t know anyone else.”

“Bullshit,” Jaemin tells him. “Do you know that we’ve gone to the gym together twice in the last week?”

Renjun did not know that. 

“And he also knows Ten. He’s the one who told Jisung to apply for that apartment.” Jaemin leans back in his seat, looking incredibly pleased with himself. “So don’t feed me that bullshit that he only sticks by you because he has no other options.”

Renjun stirs his drink absently.

“Just do it, Renjun. The plate has been paid for, and I’m sure he has a suit squirrelled away somewhere. He wouldn’t say no.”

“I can’t,” Renjun says quietly.

“Why?” 

“I don’t want to push it on him. Not after the first time.”

“It’s not the same,” Jaemin insists.

“I like him,” Renjun admits reluctantly. He’s not sure when that happened - maybe somewhere between the party and the dozens of text messages, maybe long before that.“But I can’t ask him again. I don’t want him thinking I’m using him to make Yukhei jealous. And it’s not my place to push for anything he might not want to give. I overstepped before, and I can’t do that again.”

“Have you asked him what he wants?”

“Jeno’s very straight-forward. He’d tell me,”

“Not if he’s not getting anything back. And you’re very hard to read, Jun.”

Jaemin looks at something beyond Renjun and grins. He nudges Renjun, draping himself over his back. Jeno is approaching them, eyes fixed on Renjun. “And you think he’s not giving you signs,” Jaemin snickers. “If Hendery looked at me like that right now, we would not be here for much longer.”

Renjun pushes Jaemin off of him. 

Jaemin picks up his drink, and walks backwards towards the dance floor. “Think about what I said,” he calls as he disappears.

Renjun takes another sip of his drink. 

“You’re not drinking tonight?” Jeno asks, as he takes over the bar stool besides Renjun’s. 

Renjun shakes his head. “Nope. Someone has to make sure no one does something they regret.”

“That happens a lot when people drink,” Jeno says quietly.

“Yeah it does,” Renjun agrees. Something bothers him about Jeno’s tone. He wonders if they’re thinking about the same thing. 

There’s only one way to find out.

“Do you really not remember the kiss?” he asks suddenly.

Jeno tenses beside him. “I remember,” he says after a beat. It sounds like a confession.

“Then why did you lie to me?”

Jeno shakes his head. “I didn’t.” Even in the dim lighting, Renjun can see colour in his cheeks growing deeper. “All I said, was that you didn’t have anything to apologise for.”

Renjun frowns. “What do -” And then it hits him. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Jeno says quietly. 

“You wanted it?”

“I wasn’t supposed to. But yeah, I did,” Jeno admits. “If you hadn’t run away, I would have kissed you back.”

“Oh.”

That was news. Unexpected but not unpleasant.

“And if I were to kiss you now?” Renjun asks. 

Jeno’s sharp intake of breath is all the answer he needs.

He reaches out hesitantly, fingers trailing up Jeno’s arm until they come to rest on his shoulder. Jeno melts beneath his touch.

Interesting. 

“How long?” Renjun presses his fingers into the dip of Jeno’s collarbone. 

“Months. Since before everything,” Jeno breathes “You’d come in with Jaemin and I couldn’t help it. You never spoke much to me, but when you did, you were so captivating. And so gorgeous.” He closes his eyes. “You’re so hot, Renjun. And I like you so much. I’ve never told you that.”

Renjun feels something curl in his stomach. He digs his fingers deeper into Jeno’s skin. “So all this time, you were thinking inappropriate thoughts?” 

“I hope I wasn’t the only one,” Jeno mumbles. He looks up at Renjun through heavy lidded-eyes, his gaze hazy and unfocused, his lips parted slightly.

He hasn’t seen this side of Jeno, but it fascinates him. He likes the way Jeno is pliant and receptive to his touch, likes how honest he is about what he’s thinking. More than anything, he likes how this night is going. But it’s too much to take in so quickly. He shakes his head to cut through the haze. “You can’t just say things like that,” he complains. 

Jeno shrugs. “I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true,” he says simply. He presses his cheek against Renjun’s hand, still resting on his shoulder.

There’s not a trace of shame in his voice or his posture and it awakens something in Renjun. He wonders what it would be like to be so open, how much time they could have saved if he’d just been honest about what he wanted. 

He could start doing that now.

He leans forward, lips at Jeno’s ear. “Dance with me,” he says. Jeno’s eyelids flutter closed, but he nods eagerly, and lets Renjun pull him off the stool and towards the dance floor.

* * *

Renjun is not a bad dancer, but Jeno is _incredible._ He knows exactly how to move his hips, sway his body to the music. He looks so beautiful like this, in his tight jeans, the fabric of his t-shirt clinging to his body. His pale skin glows under the phosphorescent lighting, dark hair sticking to his sweat-slick skin. Renjun can hardly look away. 

Jeno isn’t greedy, he doesn’t monopolise Renjun. During the high energy tracks, he bounces around with Jaemin, lets Chenle drag him into a silly dance battle. But when the music slows into something more subtle, more intense, he looks to Renjun, slips his hands around Renjun’s waist and pulls him flush against his body. Renjun’s skin tingles beneath the warmth of Jeno’s big hands. 

Everything feels hot and close, and Renjun can’t have Jeno looking at him right now. Because if he does, Renjun isn’t sure he can stop himself from kissing him, and for some reason, he doesn’t want their first kiss to be here, on a dark, noisy dance floor. He wants to see every reddening of Jeno’s skin, hear every breathy exhalation. So he twists in Jeno’s arms, pressing his back to Jeno’s chest, and pulling their joined hands in to rest against his stomach. 

He’s not sure how long they dance - Jaemin had abandoned them some time ago, claiming tiredness, and Jisung and Chenle had slipped away to get a drink - but all too soon Jeno is pulling away from him.

Renjun looks at him, confused. He was just starting to have a good time. 

Jeno looks apologetic. “I have to leave.”

“Why?”

“Um… I have work in the morning.”

Renjun stares at him. “You have _work_ in the morning,” he repeats. “And you came out tonight. Why would you do that?”

Jeno looks embarrassed. “You know why.”

“Oh.”

“I wish you could stay,” Renjun says quietly. It’s an embarrassing thing to admit, but it’s true.

Jeno smiles softly at him. “I’ll text you tomorrow, ok?”

Renjun nods. “Ok.”

Jeno hesitates. Suddenly he leans over towards Renjun, presses a quick kiss to the corner of Renjun’s lip.

It’s nothing - hardly even a kiss at all - but his heart flutters as he watches Jeno hurry towards the exit.

He tries not to think about it too much, but Renjun can still feel the warmth of Jeno’s lips, as he drags an unwilling Mark onto the dancefloor.

* * *

**Jeno:**  
_I’m so tired :(_

**Renjun:**  
_No sympathy from me since it’s your own fault for being stupid_

**Jeno:**  
_I’d do it again!_

**Renjun:**  
_Ugh. Loser._

**Jeno:**  
_You love it :P_

Renjun hates that he’s right.

**Renjun:**  
_You’re cheesy and embarrassing, and I regret everything._

**Renjun:**  
_But really, take it easy at work today and have an early night!_

**Jeno:**  
_Ordering couples sweatshirts as we speak._

**Renjun:**  
_I hate you. Go back to work!_

**Jeno:**  
_Fine >:(_

He doesn’t really expect Jeno to listen to him, but his phone remains silent for the rest of the day. He distracts himself with errands - picks up his suit from the dry cleaners, does his grocery shopping, even buys himself a new set of watercolours from the art store. He doesn’t have much to do, just whiles away the hours until he can go back to bed.

He’s going to have a long day tomorrow.

At eight o’clock, he finally gets another text from Jeno.

**Jeno:**  
_Taking your advice and having an early night, good luck for the wedding tomorrow :) ___

__He’s a little disappointed, but he can’t blame Jeno for being tired after last night, and his long day at work._ _

___Goodnight! _Renjun texts back.__ _ _

____And then, because he can’t help himself. _Try not to dream of me ;P__ _ _ _

____He puts his phone on silent, takes a quick shower, and follows Jeno’s example by heading straight to bed._ _ _ _

____* * *_ _ _ _

____The morning before the wedding is as expected, a rush of madness. He wakes to three panicked messages from Jaemin. He can’t find his shoes, Donghyuck’s allergic to his boutonniere, he should have fucking eloped._ _ _ _

____It’s a little funny, considering how casual Jaemin had been about the whole thing up until this point, but Renjun does his best to calm him down._ _ _ _

____After a quick breakfast, Renjun showers and dresses carefully in his suit. It’s black, and tailored perfectly, nipping in sharply at his narrow waist. He leaves his fringe down, adds some product for texture, and then he’s ready to head over to Jaemin’s._ _ _ _

____He’s not a member of the wedding party - Hendery and Jaemin had chosen to forgo groomsmen, choosing to get married with just a best man each. He’s not angry that Donghyuck got the role - he’s much more suited to locking horns with Jaemin, and giving emotional speeches, than Renjun could ever be._ _ _ _

____There’s not much for him to do at Jaemin’s apartment, so he just tries to stay out of the way while Jaemin runs up and down his apartment, looking for a belt, or misplaced cufflink. Then the car picks them up, and there are photos, and a million introductions, names he forgets almost instantly._ _ _ _

____The ceremony is beautiful. Jaemin looks radiant, his smile bright as he turns to Hendery during the exchange of vows. Jisung sobs quietly beside him, lacing his fingers tightly with Chenle’s. Mark’s eyes are glued to Donghyuck when he presents the rings to the couple. It’s almost painful to watch._ _ _ _

____Renjun absolutely does not brush a stray tear from his eyes.  
Once it’s all over, Renjun quickly congratulates the newlyweds, lets Jaemin squeeze the breath out of him, before he excuses himself, and slips into the venue._ _ _ _

____He grabs a drink from the bar, and glances at the seating chart._ _ _ _

____The venue looks perfect. Everything is crisp and simple, the flower arrangements are tasteful, the room bright and welcoming. Renjun thinks Dejun must have had some input in the decor, because both Jaemin and Hendery’s taste was questionable, and Donghyuck’s veered into the more outlandish. Renjun sips at his drink, and drifts towards his table, near the front of the reception hall._ _ _ _

____He’s seated between a typically dateless Mark, and the space set out for Renjun’s non-existent plus one. It doesn’t sting as much as he thought it would._ _ _ _

____Renjun slides into his seat. Slowly, the table fills up. The first dance goes off without a hitch, Donghyuck’s speech is both touching and appropriately humiliating - Jaemin spends the entire thing with his head buried in his hands. The entree is served and Renjun fondly watches Chenle and Jisung bicker about who deserved to get the beef (minutes late, Jisung is happily chewing on his steak. Renjun doesn’t have the heart to tell him it’s an empty victory because Chenle would let him get away with just about anything.)_ _ _ _

____Then there are more speeches, and dancing. Donghyuck bullies Mark into joining him on the dancefloor. Mark goes easily, and Renjun hopes that the two of them will get it together soon._ _ _ _

____Renjun wanders towards the bar. There’s wine at the table, but he wants something a little stronger to dull the weird sense of longing he’s feeling._ _ _ _

____He taps his foot to the beat of the music as he waits._ _ _ _

____He almost jumps out of his skin when he feels a soft touch on the back of his shoulder. Renjun twists in surprise, and he can only stare mutely when he finds himself face to face with Jeno._ _ _ _

____He looks exceptionally handsome in his suit, dark hair swept back off his face, accenting his sharp features. He smiles softly at Renjun. “Hi.”_ _ _ _

____“What are you doing here?” Renjun blurts out._ _ _ _

____It’s a stupid question. Jeno is wearing a suit. Jeno is here. Clearly, Jeno is attending Jaemin’s wedding._ _ _ _

____Jeno’s smile falters. “Jaemin invited me,” he says hesitantly. “Didn’t he tell you?”_ _ _ _

____“No.”_ _ _ _

____“Oh,” Jeno frowns. He hesitates. “Is this ok? Me being here” His voice is small, unsure._ _ _ _

____Renjun doesn’t like it._ _ _ _

____He takes a step forward. “It’s definitely ok,” he says. “More than ok.”_ _ _ _

____Jeno meets his gaze. “Yeah?” he says. “I wasn’t sure, but Jaemin seemed to think you’d want me here.”_ _ _ _

____Renjun shakes his head in disbelief. “Typical of him to be thinking about me during his own wedding.” He isn’t angry at Jaemin for interfering, he can’t be, not when Jeno is standing in front of him, smiling, and looking like that. Renjun trails an appreciative look along Jeno’s body, taking in the sight, and watching Jeno squirm under his obvious attention. The suit makes his shoulders look broader than usual. Renjun’s mouth goes dry. “I’m glad you came.” His voice comes out a full octave lower than usual. “You look really good.”_ _ _ _

____Jeno looks away, cheeks flushed. “Not as good as you.”_ _ _ _

____Renjun laughs. “It’s not a competition.”_ _ _ _

____“Thought you said that everything was.”_ _ _ _

____Renjun shrugs. “Changed my mind.” He slips his hand into Jeno’s. “Do you want to dance?”_ _ _ _

____Renjun is surprised when Jeno shakes his head. “I’d rather do something else. If that's okay with you.”_ _ _ _

____Jeno pulls him closer, hands coming to rest on Renjun’s shoulder. Renjun’s heart stutters in his chest. “Huh,” he hums casually, trailing his fingers up Jeno’s shoulder. “Don’t you think it’s too cliche for us to have our first proper kiss at a wedding?” He runs his thumb along Jeno’s jaw, rewarded by a small gasp. It’s almost inaudible, but Renjun doesn’t miss it. He grins._ _ _ _

____Jeno screws his eyes closed. “Honestly,” he says, sounding a little breathless. “I really don’t care.”_ _ _ _

____Renjun’s body shakes with a silent laugh. He brushes the hair from Jeno’s eyes. “Then go ahead.”_ _ _ _

____Jeno doesn’t need to be told twice. He leans in, nose brushing against Renjun’s, breath warm against his cheek. Jeno cups his jaw, tilts his head up forcing Renjun to look at him. Renjun doesn’t move, doesn’t breathe, paralysed by the anticipation, scared that if he does the moment will break. But then Jeno presses his lips to Renjun’s, hot and sweet, and Renjun can’t help himself. He pulls Jeno in closer, crashes their lips together like he’s starved. Jeno makes a muffled noise of surprise, but he parts his lips easily, and then it’s better, so much better._ _ _ _

____Renjun pulls away, breathing heavily. Takes in Jeno’s flushed cheeks, and spit-slick lips. He’s not ready for this to be over._ _ _ _

____He grabs Jeno’s wrist and drags him outside. Jeno doesn’t protest, doesn’t resist, and it makes this even better, to know Jeno wants this as much as he does._ _ _ _

____He pushes Jeno up against a wall, hidden away from the rest of the wedding party. Jeno looks at him, and smirks. “Are you sure that you don’t want to go show me off to your ex-boyfriend?” he asks innocently._ _ _ _

____Renjun snorts, buries the sound in the crook of Jeno’s shoulder. It’s a tempting proposition, but suddenly it just doesn’t seem that important. “Kind of have other things on my mind.”_ _ _ _

____Renjun presses up against Jeno, hands on his shoulders, gripping hard. He enjoys the way Jeno’s eyes glaze over, lips pliant against his when Renjun leans in to kiss the smirk off his face. Jeno tastes sweet, his mouth eager for Renjun’s kiss. He leans forward, chasing Renjun’s lips every time he pulls away to catch his breath. Renjun likes the way Jeno’s cheeks flush, the way his skin grows hot under Renjun’s fingertips, the desperate little sounds he works out of Jeno._ _ _ _

____Renjun pulls away, leaning his forehead against Jeno’s as he tries to regain some composure. “So does this count as our first date?” His voice is embarrassingly shaky._ _ _ _

____Jeno bites his lip, eyes dark when he looks at Renjun. “I’d say it’s our third at least. And you know what they say about the third date…”_ _ _ _

____Renjun shivers, full-bodied. He extracts himself from Jeno’s arms. “Don’t make promises you’re not going to keep.” He presses a quick kiss to Jeno’s lips, and laces their fingers together. “We can definitely talk about that later. But for now, we should head back inside.”_ _ _ _

____* * *_ _ _ _

____When they get back to their table, Chenle takes one look at Jeno - his swollen lips, reddened cheeks - at Renjun’s wrinkled suit, and exchanges a triumphant look with Jisung._ _ _ _

____Renjun doesn’t even have it in him to feel embarrassed._ _ _ _

____He’s not sure where this will lead - everything is so fresh, fragile and exciting - but with Jeno’s hand warm in his, he can’t wait to find out._ _ _ _

____He feels strangely hopeful._ _ _ _

____It’s a start._ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it. if you did, talk to me about it. if you didn't, feel free to talk to me about it as well


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